In the book I’m writing, I present questions to myself as if I’m in a therapy session, where I am both the therapist and the client. Doing this exercise helps me connect with the raw and less polished aspects of myself.
What’s going on with you today, Jaclynn?
“I want to run away and never come back.” I write. “I feel like burning my life to the ground. It just feels like, what’s the point, you know?”
I feel like that a bit right now and guilty for even saying it aloud. I’m scared that if people I love read it, they’ll worry about me, take it personally, or think I’m weird.
I am weird.
But really, it’s just an experience I have every now. I get sick of routine, responsibility, and caring for others. It’s like I become a big old bear that just wants to be left alone.
Maybe if I weren’t so worried that you’d take my mood personally, I’d be more accepting of it.
So Jaclynn, how will you counsel for the next seven hours when you feel this way?
I’m just going… to be honest. If a client asks, I’ll explain how I’m feeling isolated. Maybe there’s value in us exploring this feeling together.
Ten minutes until my virtual session.
Funny how helpful going into the heart of an experience is. Maybe I won’t quit this blog after all. *wink
Love,
Jaclynn
Going On 40 