It’s interesting the cautious steps we take in a day to avoid dangerous or unwanted scenarios. Let me explain a couple of mine from today.
If the car engine’s running and I need to quickly get something from the house, I can’t close the door. Even if it’s 20 degrees outside, like today and the cab would warm during my absence, my paranoia about the door locking kicks in. Even if I do nothing to lock it, and KNOW it’s unlocked there is a no-close module that enacts.
My next paranoia is unlocking the back door to my work’s office building. When jamming the key into the rigid hole it takes several twists to unhinge. I, at times, will momentarily and accidentally find a finger of mine through the hole in my key ring. This sends every part of me into a panic as I imagine someone on the opposite side of the fortified metal door about to press it open. Gone goes my finger, twisted and mangled like a bloody corkscrew. Although it rarely happens, when it does, and it happened this morning, it has thankfully and hopefully never will become a reality.
After searching for material to listen to while running and also reading multiple message board users’ raving reviews, I’m listening to the second season of “Thirteen Minutes To the Moon.” It is gripping, to say the least. In today’s episode, episode four, they are interviewing an engineer who was a part of “The Trench” team. “Afterwards, they asked me how sure I was of the decision I made, like 60/40 or 70/30, and never was I not at 100%. You didn’t bring something to the flight command center without being one hundred percent certain.”
Which got me thinking. How often do we make decisions prematurely or proceed forward with less confidence than we should? Just today in a counseling session, I found myself pulled to give a solution, and after hearing more information, my mindset on the problem had totally shifted. I like the idea of finding perfect solutions. And that NASA can do it; perhaps the counseling I provide will have the same level of accuracy. We are talking about people’s lives, after all.
I am in transition. To better balance work with my physical health and social health, and it feels good.
Well, onto the final two episodes of Squid Game: The Challenge. Neither Dave nor I want to watch anymore but we committed, damn it!
See you here tomorrow! Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 