Listening to an episode of This American Life on my walk at the YMCA put me in a funk. The political intensity took me back to the 2016 election and the fallout of some of my relationships afterward. I hated that (Yes, Ethan, I said hate! because I did). Just so you know: Ethan is 4 years old, Evelyn’s best friend, and he adamantly halts me mid-sentence to correct myself. I’m sorry, Ethan, but I do hate everything about that time period. I wish I’d had the knowledge I do now, that political arguments mess up friendships.
Thankfully my brother and I have cleared the air.
I hate feeling out of control like that, and how my gears get all rusty and bound up. Going into an upcoming contentious political climate, I want to keep focus, on my own humanity and others. Anger and rage’s choke hold around my Adam’s apple is far from what excites me.
Want to know what excites me? This lovely bowl of heated brownie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top. Also, earlier when Dave held the handle of a jump rope while I held the other end, and seeing Evelyn jump five in a row. Which she’s never done before. I want to be available for moments like that, to see her bigger-than-normal smile and bigger-than-normal laugh, and the pride she has in accomplishing something new.
I’m typing while listening in as Shel Silverstein’s “The Missing Piece Meets Big O” is read to Evelyn. I read it last night and enjoyed the twists and turns of a splinter-like wedge of a shape trying to find its place. At one point, the piece fit perfectly into a circle with a missing chunk, but after a couple of pages, the piece had grown, and the circle was moving on. “Wait!” the wedge piece said, “We went so well together, rolling around and all that.” Those are my words, not Shel’s.
“No, pointy thing. I got to go! To roll on my own. How about you smooth off and get to rolling yourself?”
I liked the surprise of not ending with the two of them molding together, but rather that they continued molding and working on themselves.
At last night’s get-together, my friend Kristen found yellowish-brown drips on the toilet seat. Thinking it was one of the boys far too messy she toilet papered it off, but then got hit with a drop. Water had been coming in from the top edge of the bathroom’s windowsill. A walk outside showed that over the window is an eave, meaning the water is flowing in from somewhere along the roof line. That’s outside our expertise and a job for our roofer neighbor Chuck.
Lastly, have you heard about composting human bodies’ remains? Well, my friend who stayed the night last night had it done with his wife recently. Since October her body has been decomposing in a mixture of wood, and alfalfa, and just last night he received an email that the mixture is ready to pick up. It’s 250 lbs of material, and he’ll need a small truck to haul it. He’s undecided about how much to take. The only thing he’s certain about is he wants a small amount to pack in on a hike up to Ross Lake. But whatever he doesn’t take, the company will use it on a farm or something similar.
I want that. Three months of spinning right round, baby, right round, like a record baby to be turned back into nature? Yes, please.
I think I’ve covered it all for tonight. I hope your weekend is going swimmingly. Talk to you tomorrow.
Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 