Reading the headlines “French pole vaulter’s bulge cost him the Olympics” and “French pole vaulter Anthony Ammirati misses Olympic final after manhood catches on crossbar” had me laughing harder and harder at each reporter’s try at skirting around the word penis.
I worry I’m not being authentic when writing. That felt like the most genuine thing I could have written! It’s hard when the number of thoughts and their different contents make it impossible for me to pin one down. It’s sort of, but not kind of been like catching a greased pig, holding onto it, and embracing it with a big, wet kiss.
Archie is seated at my feet, soaking and immersing himself in the Southern lifestyle. A fox picked off two of my sister-in-law’s ducks, and all the ruckus has left a strong scent for him to whiff. This farm life is a hard one; the last I heard, the Pekin duck is behind the shed with no head, and the black one had been dropped from the fox’s mouth and is now in a cage, working out a deal with life and death.
I’m impressed with Goodwill’s selection of summer dresses. For $14, I picked up two, one bright red and one blue earlier today.
The fire ants are smaller and are bigger assholes than the ones back home. Not knowing that I stepped on their mound led to me being shocked when I saw the little black suckers like specks of dirt all over the top of my foot and ankle. I brushed off the first couple of bites, not knowing how bad it was. But after an assault of stings hit me from every angle, I knew I was in trouble. It’s twenty minutes later, and I’m still feeling their effects. “They’ll pus up too and hurt like that for a few days,” my brother-in-law told me afterward.
Lessons so far: Southern people are friendly. The ants aren’t.
My favorite part of the day was the weather shift because it felt like a tantruming child. But way more fun. One minute it was uncomfortably hot and humid, and in the 90s; the next, buckets of rain that the highest-powered windshield wiper position couldn’t touch and a drop of 20 degrees. Thundershowers are fabulous.
Although it’s only been a couple of days of living here feeling confident this is where I’m meant to be.
I’ll keep scoping things around here and tell you all about them tomorrow. For now, take care. Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 