An Idahoan blogger was charged with defamation for a post she wrote and ordered to pay 1.1 million dollars. As a fellow blogger, you bet I scoured the news article with a lice comb, picking between the lines at each and every what-not-to-do. And what I found was pretty simple: Beware of your biases or having an agenda; they will lead you astray.
I must admit I do have an agenda here, and it’s very straightforward. At times, it’s the commitment to you and to myself to write every day. In others, it’s translating my experience to the page in descriptive and playful ways. When doing so, my biases exist, but not unlike the mole at the center of my neck, I know them and call them out.
In graduate school for counseling, much of our coursework was geared toward uncovering and challenging our biases. Also, in training for my sex offender treatment provider license, I sat in on a lecture about them.
I learned my biases, know them, and, over time, these wildly and unsavory beasts have become my friends. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t trust them completely, but I do try to give them a leash length about yay big to have some breathing room.
Maybe you haven’t spent a ton of time with this stuff and are wondering how in the heck you spot your biases. Well, you can start by listening to the generalizations you make about a person or a place, and your all-or-nothing thoughts, and the times you are seeing situations through an us versus them lens.
Although we are hardwired with this tribal mindset—think *beats chest* “Ugg. You’re safe if you look like me” – (or talk like me, or like the same team, or share the same beliefs)—it is these hard lines that separate you and me that can lead to harmful behaviors.
In other news, we have a driveway! We also have a few railing posts and under-counter kitchen lights. A washer, dryer, dining room light, bathroom mirrors, and a motion-activated switch are in the mail.
Why a motion-activated switch, you ask? Well, I need to tell a short and boring story. Two nights ago, I walked through our dark house with my phone’s flashlight on after a session. Through the dark living into the kitchen, I walked, slipping my hand over the wall for a switch, and found nothing. On the left and right sides of both walls leading into the kitchen, there was nothing. It turns out the light switch got tucked close to the cabinets in an obscure and not-so-convenient space making braille-ing around in the dark necessary.
Enter Paula’s suggestion for a motion-activation switch, marrying Dave’s idea of it having a dimmer. So, the under-counter lights will turn on nice and dim right when you need them during your 1 a.m. double-stuf Oreo fix.
I squeezed all the writing juice out of myself for this evening. I hope you have an excellent weekend! Take care, Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 