Category Archives: Writings

I looked down at my Apple Watch, the screen bouncing like I was unbuckled on an off-roading ATV. It took three glances to see the output: 2.14 miles. The disappointment hung over me like Mr. T’s gold chains draped across his trunk of a neck. I want running to be easy. To come easy toContinue reading “Runner’s High Membership”

I’m going to reschedule our time together for tomorrow if you don’t mind. Love, Jaclynn

I choose stocks I believe in. Not like the Jesus-or-Santa-Claus belief, but like the “my Seattle Seahawks would win the Super Bowl” belief. Spoiler: they did.Also, not a spoiler, because it already happened and is public knowledge. I do turn a tad manic after I buy a stock. Once it’s snug in the portfolio, I pull upContinue reading “Don’t Stop Believin’”

There’s a counseling sentiment at the start of sessions that goes, “I don’t have anything to talk about,” and 99.9% of the time, it’s false. Of course, we have things to talk about. The internal world is a circus on crack cocaine, spinning like a top on the tip of a monkey’s finger — spring-loadedContinue reading “I Was Runnninnnng”

“That’s enough to taste it,” is how I measure the heavy cream for my morning coffee. Grinch coffee cup in hand — the one that somehow escaped being boxed up until next Christmas — I carry it to the window. The window overlooks the resort’s employee parking lot and a ridgeline of pines. My deep-breathContinue reading “Gorilla Cart Success”

I have loose rubber chicken arms and legs now — where fat once was, and muscle hasn’t quite grown in to replace it. But maybe the mirror at the Great Wolf Lodge is the problem. The one at home has me flexing and dancing in front of it like I’m on stage at a bodybuildingContinue reading “What Guilt Really Needs”

I took off running — out the fire exit door and across the blackened Great Wolf Lodge parking lot. The flip from 79 degrees to a severe weather wind advisory and biting chill isn’t exactly premium running weather. But compared to tomorrow’s forecast — 20 degrees and wind — I weighed the two and choseContinue reading “Running Down a Dream”

“How do I take care of myself while carrying that much?” On the back patio’s rug, I feel it — a threat. Instability. Like someone is mocking me. Like it’s not okay to feel this way. Why can’t it be okay to feel unstable? Have I wobbled off the wobble board into crazy town? YouContinue reading “Calming the Beast”

Is it appropriate to roll into the Great Wolf Lodge with my military tank of a wagon — aka the Gorilla cart — this Sunday? The thought hit me with a flutter of excitement in my solar plexus. Not just for the mindset I’m bringing (say yes to Evelyn for every slide, wave pool, andContinue reading “The Anti-Social Club”

I notice things in my clients that I notice in myself. One is outrunning — the quick-paced busyness of our days, counteracting the need to slow down, to be present, to listen to what we’re really trying to say. What may need to be said is an apology. Or sitting with our fragility. Feeling theContinue reading “The Things We Avoid”