I was demoted from superior, and the blow came just hours after our clan leader reassured us that it wasn’t personal. But all I know is that Astarte is no longer among the elite, and my worth felt like it was on the chopping block—and got cleavered. Rejection, whether from a game on your phone,Continue reading “The Motivating Sting of Rejection”
Category Archives: Writings
Loving and Letting Go: A Journey With Grief
At 16, I stuffed the shock of giving CPR to my dying mom deep inside. I’d talk about it matter-of-factly, like a judge handing down a life sentence—utterly void of emotion. No one taught me how to grieve, so along with burying her six feet under, I buried my feelings too. I said I wasContinue reading “Loving and Letting Go: A Journey With Grief”
Discipline: The Heartbeat of Success
Discipline drowns out the noise—what others think, what you think—it says, “I don’t care; I’m doing this regardless.” It is the beating heart of any goal worth achieving. For 956 days, I’ve posted a blog article. Discipline is paramount, whether it’s a single sentence, a photo on days when I have less to give, orContinue reading “Discipline: The Heartbeat of Success”
Anchors Amidst the Chaos
Life moves at a different rhythm in a town where a handshake seals deals and neighbors know you by your car’s honk. Seven months ago, our house contractor stopped by the Holy Pie Pizzeria to tell the owner—the town’s building inspector—that he was starting to build. Bypassing the regular permitting process, a short chat andContinue reading “Anchors Amidst the Chaos”
Smile for the Camera
It’s one of those nights where I’m in my head. Second-guessing everything I do, tightness in my chest, and a slight void in my eyes. I’m here but not here; I feel sensitive even when mentioning it. But harder is pretending everything is okay when it’s not. Despite feeling optimistic about the house’s progress andContinue reading “Smile for the Camera”
Underwater Ballet
“I can’t fall asleep with a pupper cut, pup-er, paper cut,” Evelyn blubbers out from the top bunk to Dave, whose height puts him at eye level with her. I’ve taken my turn at consoling, so Dave takes a hand to her back as I snuggle up below, not on the lower bunk but onContinue reading “Underwater Ballet”
The Brick Road
The carpet has been laid. No, that’s not a euphemism; it’s a fact, Jack. For my final evening session, I lay my stomach on it, chin resting on my elbows, feeling the night-and-day difference from barren and rugged floor to soft and comfy. The master bathroom and the half bath remain mirrorless, and the kitchenContinue reading “The Brick Road”
Just A Night
Within me—my mind, body, thoughts—there’s this inner dialogue I’m observing. It’s an uncertain voice, timid even, and I question its role in my life. At times, I think it’s godlike, an omnipotent crystal ball. Other times, I wish I could banish it from me forever. And still, at different times, I think it’s a telepathicContinue reading “Just A Night”
Spaghetti For Lunch
It amazes me that I can hold up a Pinterest photo of a space and, like a sketch artist bringing a criminal’s face to life, the workers get my vision and bring it to reality. I can’t thank them enough for their care and attunement to our needs in building our house. Their talents andContinue reading “Spaghetti For Lunch”
All is Well
In a search for a mantra to cope with the unsettled feeling that comes with home uprooting and transition, Dave reminded me of the poem “Desiderata.” He’s pointed it out to me before, and instantly, like a compass finding and bouncing towards North, I felt a sense of security at the suggestion. Before I pasteContinue reading “All is Well”
Going On 40 