Procrastinating X’s and O’s

Was it one of the worst night’s sleep of my life? No, but it might be in the top 100. As my body crumpled in the center of a deflating mattress on the tenth wake-up, I headed to one couch, and Dave headed for the other. This morning, when we met up like weary travelers, our heavy eyes and bodies told the tale, “Terrible, I slept terribly,” we parroted. Which is a far cry from our usual, “Good!”

I’m in the exterior shop/living room area typing this, away from the bustle of the house. Are there ten, or are there eleven people inside, all doing different things? At the dining room table with a board game, cooking pasta salad, all while the young girls play with toys.

Not only did the sinking Titanic of a makeshift bed need to be put away, but I needed some space. My feelings from last night have spilled into today, like an emotional hangover that seems to need space like a noxious fume, vented and purified.

I did hear back from the office owner and can do a 6-month lease with a month-to-month option after. It is a major relief that my clients and I won’t meet on the street corner coffee shop only to be shooed off like a stray dog.

My main concern is since I’m licensed and credentialed as a therapist in Washington state but doing virtual counseling out of Georgia, wait, text coming in. “I read last night’s blog. You’re going to be fine, Jaclynn. I know it feels overwhelming, but you’re not doing it alone. And anything we can do to help, just say so. We’ll get together once we’re home.” I really needed that, and if you could see my glistening eyes and running nose and the relief I’m feeling at reading my stepmom’s words, you’d know how much my soft spot needed a pat.

Today’s job of spray painting bright orange Xs on the trees needing to be cut down is a no-go as it’s a stormy and cold day. With a clear sky in the forecast tomorrow, as well as our last day here, we’ll walk the land just one more time before the next time – in a month and a half – a foundation slab and walls will have gone up. It’s a wild process, but after an hour-and-a-half conversation with the builder today, I’m feeling very confident.

After spinning my wheels about how to verify all my client’s insurance will be accepted I realized that can’t be my job. It’d be much easier and make more sense to have them contact their insurance providers.

So I drew up a letter I’ll be sending out, basically saying I’ll be ending in person in June or July and starting virtually then.

It’s wild to think this is happening. I hope I’m past the rockiest wave, but who knows when or if the next one will come. I’ll be ready.

Take care. Love, Jaclynn