Belly breathing—or diaphragmatic breathing—calms the nervous system. A fact I was reminded of in an educational video. So here I am, filling my lower abdomen with air, releasing it gently, and repeating. Because on nights like this, when writing feels de-prioritized, and the space for it seems nonexistent, that panicky voice creeps in. The one that wants to flip the table, send plates crashing to the floor, and sneer, “Don’t write. Be done.”
But here’s the thing: I refuse to shut down my writing time. It’s mine. It’s valuable. The whole “chop chop, hurry up and write already” energy? It only activates my inner rebel. The one that rolls its eyes and snaps back, “Go eff yourself.” Because no one tells me what to do.
Breathing helps, though. I’ll give it that. Slow, intentional breaths settle the chaos. Try it. Put a hand on your chest if you need to. Tell yourself it’s okay. Focus on your lower abdomen filling, pushing out, and softening back.
On the phone earlier, regarding an entirely different topic, my brother asked me, “Would that have happened if you’d approached that situation cautiously?”
He’s got a point. Mistakes, errors, and disconnection—from ourselves and the world around us—thrive in a chaotic mind. A mind that’s too cluttered to notice the basics: breathing, eating well, sleeping enough, drinking water, taking care of yourself.
These simple acts are the foundation of who we are—for ourselves and for others. When I move too fast or neglect my needs, I’m just setting myself up for future struggles.
Take this recent example: I reached out to a potential Spanish conversational partner. At first, it seemed fine, but then they asked a few questions about my husband that made me uncomfortable. Nothing outrageous, but just enough to make me stop. So, I blocked them. No explanation, no guilt trip—just a clean break. Why? Because I don’t have space for that energy in my life.
It’s not about being ruthless; it’s about knowing what I need. And what I don’t. Protecting your space—your time, your energy, your peace—isn’t selfish; it’s survival. And survival with intention is how we thrive.
Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 