Jaclynn Loibl

Make That Shit Magical

You know how people say, “That’d make a good band name” or “That’d make a great t-shirt?” Instead of simply agreeing and moving on, I actually did it. Not the band name, the t-shirt. After calling a friend to talk my anxious feelings down, she was all about self-care. “Put on slippers. Get comfy. IContinue reading “Make That Shit Magical”

Turger Burger

“I used to have a marble collection, did you? I mean, it wasn’t much of a collection. It was just a bag of marbles, but some of them I really liked. One was an actual marble, not glass. It looked like the world, but not on purpose, just coincidentally. And it was oversized, but notContinue reading “Turger Burger”

Personal Lab Rat

I’m my own mental health guinea pig. During an hour’s break at work, I stopped by Fred Meyer to fill up the gas tank. As the price steadily increased, I checked in with myself. Blah. Nothing much. Slightly sad. Then it registered, “Oh, I’m feeling depressed.” Recalling an email I’d left open, a self-care newsletter,Continue reading “Personal Lab Rat”

Covid Couch Calls

I feel a fondness flowing over me, like the scent of chocolate chip cookies at Grandma’s, the kind one’s house, not the scary one. It’s a song by the Decemberists that transports me. Down memory lane to early Covid, to my rebellious non-adopting mask self, and to being locked up with a never-satisfied newborn and aContinue reading “Covid Couch Calls”

Solving School Shootings

I had a terrible thought born of wanting to solve a horrific situation. I won’t share my idea, but know it came after hearing of the children swinging, giggling, and having fantasies of their next sugar fix that were shot dead in Nashville. I read and watched the video footage, and I feel as sickContinue reading “Solving School Shootings”

The Jaywalking Gigolo

The red hand at crosswalks is merely a suggestion. Walking several blocks to Climate Pledge Arena, I blow through them with the ease of a hardened hooker. As a Pacific Northwesterner, I know I should wait, but out East, they don’t, and since I’m a small-town girl that broke out, the rules have changed. AllContinue reading “The Jaywalking Gigolo”

A Genital Joust

We took the eight-minute walk to see the ocean; rest assured, it’s still there. How to describe the deep grayish-lavender layer of cloud cover to you and how it made me feel? A desire to never leave; that’s what it was. The rain pooling on the railing was fun to watch. Its bubble leavings swirlContinue reading “A Genital Joust”

Middle-Aged Lady Rap

I’m a midnight grinder, a shamrock finder, got a calendar, don’t need a reminder. I’m built Ford tough, edges rough, whenever I’m hot springin’ it’s in the buff. I down my steak rare, am a baller at foursquare, you better believe I oppose the electric chair. I’ve never had a gallstone, send messages via Iphone,Continue reading “Middle-Aged Lady Rap”

Coming From Behind

I have buried in me, an Eeyore-like asshole that kicks rocks and spews “Meh’s” and, “This is boring,” for fun. No matter how many shiny things I throw at him, he simply is not having any of it. I guided a client just this week to accepting their obstinate a-hole; so, I’d better practice whatContinue reading “Coming From Behind”

Why So Serious?

The crayon-written, scotch-taped on everything to-do notes are a memorable aspect of my grandparent’s cabin in Eastern, Washington. Affixed to heaters, the refrigerator, faucets, fireplace, and sliding glass doors were directions followed by asterisks, stars, and exclamation points that acted like gentle hands on your shoulder guiding you to the cabin’s best practices. Following in myContinue reading “Why So Serious?”