Insecurity is like a massive stain on the front of a white shirt. You can move your arms in front of it, consciously contorting this way and that to try and cover it up. But no matter what, whether anyone notices or not – you know it’s there.
It’s hard to break from the “I’m gonna show them!” waving a fist-in-the-air, need-to-be right attitude.
Well, it is for me anyway. (If don’t you remember, I’m pretty dang competitive.)
I think it stems from an insecurity I have that I’m not smart enough, something I’ve experienced as far back as grade school.
But what the heck does “smart enough” even mean anyway? That someone won’t recognize my intelligence? Or that I’m not as quick-minded as someone else? I don’t know what it means exactly; rationalizing with the irrational just doesn’t work.
It wasn’t all too long ago when my best friend called me out mid-sentence, “Jaclynn. They’re not insecurities; they’re growth areas.”
Dang, how had I not noticed that before?
And this is why I think life is the nuts; that we get to continue to learn things and grow throughout the entirety of our lives.
In other news, all the random stuff piled high in the bathroom started to make my skin crawl. I expressed my feelings to Dave and told him I badly need his help; to tell me what to do, and where to go – I was over it!
And he did. So now we have a basement full of boxes to go through at a later date. More on that later.
Decluttering wisdom of the day; utilize a support person.
Last but not least, I’m enjoying the book “The House on the Cerulean Sea.” I had to look up the word “cerulean,” thinking it was a city and wanting to know where it was located. But it’s not a city I found; it’s dark blue.
So there’s that.
Do you have other things to get to like me?
How about we do them and meet here again tomorrow. Sound good?
Ok, great!
Love ya,
Jaclynn
Going On 40 