I drop in here like the YouTube yoga instructor so gently reminds me each day in practice. I take it to mean releasing the past, focusing, and tuning into the now. A slight buzz exists in my chest area, it’s tight, so I follow my breath also like she instructs. I pause, breathe three times, in and out.
As if enjoying the extra oxygen, my body reflexively yawned twice to suck down even more.
When I thought of tomorrow and the things I have yet to do, my chest retightened.
A thought-provoking counseling session earlier inspires me to tune into this feeling, and see what it is I’m needing.
Security in knowing that everything will be ok? Maybe. But also that I’ll take the necessary time to reflect, and fully listen to what I need.
And what I realize is preparation for the work week matters to me; To schedule progress note writing, yoga, Spanish learning, and writing time so I’m not rushing. Man, I hate it when I do that to myself.
Tomorrow: Do Spanish on the drive to work and before bed. Yoga at my 11 am break and write a post during my 3 pm break. And progress notes? (Although therapists do take notes during sessions, I find it jarring and borderline disrespectful, yet it does ensure an accurate and timely note is taken.)
A text exchange with my friend Lindsay just now led to our solidifying plans for an ocean trip together with our kids. When I told Dave, his response was, “Wow”. It will be the most prolonged period he’s been alone during his Dad-dom.
I can’t wait! Evelyn is going to lose her shit. Sure, Evelyn and Ethan take swimming lessons together and spend time at the park, but an entire weekend? My mind is awhirl with fun possibilities.
I suck at goodbyes. But if not goodbye, then what to say? I love sharing my life, and life in general, with you. It makes me so happy to do this daily. I appreciate you being here and a part of it. Thank you.
Love, Jaclynn
Going On 40 