No Escape From Reality

I’m very against bragging. I’d stand on a pulpit, wave my fist and lament how doing so is a failing to our most supreme sensibilities. And yet, is it all that wrong to talk oneself up or feel prideful in something done well?

I become uninterested quickly. While writing this post, I picked up my phone; Did my 3 pm client email me why they’re late? Next, push and scroll TikTok and search for yoga mats and dumbells on Offerup and Facebook marketplace.

I’m a creature of habit that wishes I wasn’t. How do I step away from the highly addictive patterns I fall into on my phone?

My mind snapped to a memory of standing on my neighbor’s lawn and watching the police take my ex-boyfriend away in handcuffs. That clear-cut line in my life seems to have relevance here.

But how do I switch off this unhealthy pattern while not filling the space with something equally unwanted?

I hate to do this to myself, but it’s the only option I see. As of now, Tuesday, November 8th, 2022, I hereby ban myself from TikTok, Facebook Marketplace, and OfferUp.

Are you an all-or-nothing person too?

Now, for something lighter. My softball coach in high school was a prankster, and when my best friend and I were in his classroom, he asked her, “Hey, have you lost some weight?” My friend, at 17, conscious of her body type, smiled big and said, “Yes, I have.” Without missing a beat, he said, “Turn around; I think I found it.”

Is that still PC for teachers to say to students in the 2020s? Probably not.

I have a friend that called, left a message, and I am still waiting to return her call. And it’s been a month. Have I thought about her? Yes. Should I call her? Yes. So why don’t I? Ok, fine. Tomorrow.

Look at me making changes.

I’m happy with the minor edit to the bedroom I’ve been talking about doing, and if you didn’t know, it’s the photo for this post. (I still need to get a yoga mat and dumbells. Sigh.)

Well, with that, I better get to my nightly self-care routine. I’ll chat with you tomorrow.

Night! Love, Jaclynn

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