“I used to have a marble collection, did you? I mean, it wasn’t much of a collection. It was just a bag of marbles, but some of them I really liked. One was an actual marble, not glass. It looked like the world, but not on purpose, just coincidentally. And it was oversized, but notContinue reading “Turger Burger”
Category Archives: Funny
Duck, Rooster!
“The circle, the circle of life.” To start this tale, I declare that nature is a toilet to us all: The bats and the bees, the buffaloes and the bunnies. All allow their excrement to return home to whither it once sprung. But this, my confidants, has nothing to do with the deposits of animals.Continue reading “Duck, Rooster!”
The Tale of The Teeniest Rubber Chicken
Eyes sunk deep in their sockets, I trudge myself to work. Last night’s D&D session 11 pm, followed by writing and yoga, led to a late night for this sweet body of mine. I felt it, too, like a hangover. Still, when arriving at my office, snaking through its corners, and flipping on lights, IContinue reading “The Tale of The Teeniest Rubber Chicken”
Scent Of A Woman
Out of concern about the partner of a client feeling ganged up on (this happened previously to them in couples therapy), I wonder if I over-corrected and my client felt that way. I hope not. I am sweaty; not tears coming out of my pores sweaty, but a subtle “ooh, it’s humid out” kind. SlappingContinue reading “Scent Of A Woman”
Bada Bing, Bada Boom
“I don’t like ’em. It’s not only the mush, but the firm. Like, pick a side, ya know?” A Tony Soprano-like client’s negative feelings towards mushrooms made the tea almost come out of my mouth and back into the cup. Thankfully I’m used to his humor. I also learned how clients cook their annual turkeys,Continue reading “Bada Bing, Bada Boom”
Nitwit Lice Lessons
I pushed six wheelbarrows full of browning and yellowing fallen leaves into the slippery, muddy muck of the duck pen. Not often do the ducks wag their tails, but at seeing the piles of leaves, their back ends happily swished to and fro like fans on a hot day. Did you know that lice eggsContinue reading “Nitwit Lice Lessons”
No Escape From Reality
I’m very against bragging. I’d stand on a pulpit, wave my fist and lament how doing so is a failing to our most supreme sensibilities. And yet, is it all that wrong to talk oneself up or feel prideful in something done well? I become uninterested quickly. While writing this post, I picked up myContinue reading “No Escape From Reality”
Tree Fallin’
“I need to put water in my belly,” Evelyn said, hiccupping and running to find her glass. Remembering what my Mom used to do for me, yet unsure of its efficacy, I said, “Come on, let’s try a teaspoon full of sugar.” “Yes, sugar!” She shouted in delight. Sitting on Dave’s lap for a pre-bedtimeContinue reading “Tree Fallin’”
Break A Leg
It is a blur, but I can make out the curvature of its face, the light, and dark of its body, how it swoops smoothly and lowly, and its massive and oblong shape. An owl, I realize. Dave and I see it amidst playing pretend with Evelyn using a stick for an oar and a roundContinue reading “Break A Leg”
You’re So Vain
Aren’t we all doing the best we can? You might disagree, and that’d be alright cause we all know your Uncle Joe could be doing better. I tried that sentence on Dave to see if it’s funny. He gave a hearty laugh with a, “Well, yeah, that’s because I have an Uncle Joe, and heContinue reading “You’re So Vain”
Going On 40 