A gun is pushing into the center of my back. I must do what I’m told. There’s a pressure inside me, an unknown force that strongholds my thoughts, stifles creativity, and makes me feel utterly powerless. I’d like to perform a badass MMA move on it. Specifically, The Undertaker’s tombstone pile driver – ain’t nobodyContinue reading “Unbreak My Heart”
Author Archives: Jaclynn Loibl
I Don’t Remember
I don’t remember how he picked up his feet when he walked or whether his burgundy woolen slippers skimmed the ground or if they left it with room to spare. I don’t remember the kind of cup he poured his box of red wine Franzia into. I’d surely remember if it was a proper stemmedContinue reading “I Don’t Remember”
No Diggity
Who am I to want to be a writer? And who am I to think other people will be interested in what I write? These thoughts plague, taunt and cajole me into doubt. And it’s this seed of insecurity that burrows in me like one of those creepy insect-bots from sci-fi films. But not toContinue reading “No Diggity”
One Week
I’m not fond of my serious side, even though I know it’s an essential aspect of my identity. But like Barenaked Naked Ladies said, “I’m the kind of guy that laughs at a funeral,” so I suppose there are others out there like me. I remember the first client I ever saw, a woman freshlyContinue reading “One Week”
Final Thoughts
Suicide notes, one of the final actions of a person’s life, have always interested me. I recently found a study that analyzed 23 suicide notes with the goal of adding to the literature on suicide prevention. The results showed that over 80% of the notes included shame, guilt, or an apology in their contents. WhichContinue reading “Final Thoughts”
Dead Hearts
The fewer number of unknowables in my life, the better. Side note: I love my deodorant. At our last family Christmas dinner, I sniffed a divine scent on my sister-in-law, which made my olfactories go a bit bonkers. I had to know it and had to have it – whatever it was. It turns outContinue reading “Dead Hearts”
Margarita Villa
Coffee shops used to be a destination, not just a driveby. I’d sustain myself for hours with a backpack filled with a charger, laptop, phone, book, and a little cash. I’d start off with a coffee, level up to a pastry, and if I sat long enough get a soup or panini. I miss theContinue reading “Margarita Villa”
Lesson On Guilt
What’s the emotion you least like experiencing and why? Mine has always been guilt. I think it’s because guilt usually comes wrapped with fear and anxiety like bacon and cream cheese do in a jalapeno popper. Too much guilt is like weeds in a garden. A few are fine, but the more you have, theContinue reading “Lesson On Guilt”
Ugh
I don’t know how to ask this heavy and chaotic mind of mine to do anything. I am out in the ozone, staring off and putting off writing. I want you to know I’m ok. Really. But how does one write and find their voice when lost in a maze? Maybe I will start byContinue reading “Ugh”
You’re So Sensitive
Do you know when basketball or soccer players fall to the ground intentionally to try to draw a penalty? But, just like the Griswold’s turkey at Christmas, it can be so overdone that you can’t help shake your head at the display. We live in a hyper-sensitive time where the line between what’s ok andContinue reading “You’re So Sensitive”